Avoidable signs of not listening:
- Hostile tone
- Passive aggressive questioning
- Response before thought / considering viewPoint of other party
- Lack of empathy / unwillingness to acknowledge concerns and opinions of others
- Negative body language
- Use of the wrong communication medium / inviting miss-understanding
When others make one or more of these mistakes, be a leader and do not oblige with the same approach/mistake. If you are their leader, do take the time to reflect on their approach and coach afterwards. If it is a peer, realize that taking the same approach in a response fuels divide; you can’t make someone else grow, but how you react will have an impact and influence regardless of the chain of command.
And when we are guilty of not listening we should have humility, correct it, and move forward together. Grow from it – it is what others expect and what will be respected.